Today I was asked a question about why I don’t talk more about the intricacies of WW in my blog. I thought it was an odd question, but valid all the same. The topics I cover here are based on the thoughts and feelings I go through every week as I make my way into creating healthy habits for a lifetime – sometimes this results in a ‘dear diary’ sort-of effort, other times it throws up more interesting material. I’m not any sort of WWs ambassador and am far from perfect when it comes to following the plan, but ultimately I still hope to help people along their journey, even if it’s just distracting them from snacking for a few minutes to read my blog. Plus, that’s what you pay your Monthly Pass for.
Keeping on Track
In my last post I talked a little about the day-to-day grind of keeping up motivation and how it can affect us emotionally. Today I had to heed my own words, and thought about my situation (and all of YOU, too). I’ve not had the best week, my eating master plan for work backfired (Hank Marvin at 9 in the morning in the middle of nowhere with nothing to eat), I ended up with surprise guests over the weekend and running opportunities have been limited. I could have easily just written this week off, not gone for a run this morning and called it a do.
I had a pretty good chat with myself – I knew I wanted to go for a run, I knew it would do me good, but I was cosy on the sofa in my slippers with the dogs… Cordelia popped in as the voice of reason: ‘If you run today/tomorrow and REALLY keep your points in check, you are making less work for yourself next week – even if you gain, it will be less than if you don’t do anything…..’. Shes right. Again. (No wonder Walter doesn’t like her)
It made me think about my actions over the last nine months and what’s changed. My weight loss hasn’t been as rapid as I would have liked, but I’m a dress size smaller, I’m a different shape, I’m a lot fitter and I eat less than I used to. That’s progress. The only reason this has happened is because I’ve kept at it. I could have easily given up over the last six weeks, and although they’ve been crazy, I still had it in my head that I’d be going back to class. There was no questioning or reasoning in my head, that’s just the way it was, and I’m glad.
You only lose the fight if you stop fighting. So fight. And keep fighting. You WILL win eventually if you keep fighting. So fight.
I ran like hell this morning. (Well, as like hell as a 3-stone overweight 5ft 3 Italian with short legs can) I ran my home route with it’s downhill/uphill carry on, and push, push pushed all the way. Normally I try and hold back a bit on the way out so I don’t run out of steam in the last half-mile – today I ran like that little boy in the playground. At one point I was running an eight-and-a-half minute mile (waaay to fast for hills!) and guess what? I regretted it on the way back up.
Fighting Like Hell
My face was hot. The sweat was dripping into my eyes, stinging, and my legs were screaming at me. My high-vis was annoying me. So was my armband. I wanted to take all my clothes off because I was too warm. I wanted to slap the Runkeeper lady and tell her to shut up. I wanted to stop and walk so, so, so bad. At that point, Cordelia started with me again, and I really wasn’t in the mood. Am I going to be sick? No. Am I going to pass out? No. Am I dead? No. Well keep running then.
I repeated this to myself out loud all the way back in the last mile (I’m REALLY glad there’s not many people about where I live!) in amongst things like ‘Dig in!’, ‘Come on, Gem, get a grip!’ and ‘ PUSH!, Nearly there!’
I made it home and literally had everything off before I was inside the porch door. It was then, when I stopped that I realised I’m actually full of willpower, determination and sheer stubbornness. I just need to harness it a bit better. After looking at my Runkeeper, I saw why being determined is good, and why it’s important to keep on fighting. I ran my 5k hill route in twenty-eight minutes and forty-seven seconds. My route best is 30:41. My season best (on a much flatter course) is 30:01.
See What Determination Can Do?
Can you imagine how differently my day could have turned out if I didn’t go that run this morning? I’d probably still be languishing in my jammies pinning winter scenes to my Christmas Pinterest board, eating toast and drinking tea. It’s completely set me up for the rest of the day, and I know my eating and tracking will be spot on. It’s also spurred me on to carry through to weigh-in tomorrow night, and even though there is a possibility that I might put on, I know it won’t be as much as it could have been.
So please, if you are having an off day/week, do something positive RIGHT NOW and things will change. Take two things from this post today:
- ‘I’m not puking, I’m not fainting, I’m not dead, so I’m running’
- You’ll only lose the fight if you stop fighting……