I can’t stop eating today.
I’m tracking my food intake, but I actually cannot stop eating. I’ve gone through the mental checklist – boredom? Nope. Emotional eating? Nope. Bingeing? Nope. So what the hell is this? Answer: I have no idea. I’m talking proper rumbly-in-my-tumbly hungry….
It’s 6pm, and I managed to tear myself away and slam the anchors on my kitchen capers at 2pm. I think dinner this evening will be a light meal and that will be the full stop at the end of the sentence- a sort-of damage limitation exercise. You would think that my success on the scales yesterday would be a good enough wave to ride for at least a couple of days! Apparently not. And that is because I still think like a fat person.I know I am still a fat person, but that’s half the point of the exercise (pardon the pun).
This is probably the hardest thing to overcome when losing weight. After being heavy for such a long time, you need to change the inside to match the outside. For about a year after I lost weight the first time, I automatically looked at the back of clothes rails in shops for the biggest sizes, even though I was wearing a 12. Sometimes I even bought a 12 knowing that it was a little loose and could have probably gotten a 10. This is because I was still thinking fat. The nice thing about it is catching a glimpse of your reflection and realising it’s you – that’s a great feeling.
I’m going to put today down to thinking fat. My brain is trying to tell me that the last week or so has been one big game, and it’s ready to go back to normal. Well guess what buddy, this is normal. Ha. Take that, fat brain!
My thin brain really should be kicking in about now, but I suppose it might take a few weeks for my body to get used to smaller portions and an overall lesser amount of food. Is this possible? Anyway, I feel better for getting it out there, and tomorrow is another day.
Don’t let the fat brain win!